Sister Zinaida, can you please tell us about your obedience in the boarding home?

Twelve years ago, when the first sisters of mercy came to the National Psychiatric Clinic they had to spread their ministry over all the departments. Apart from the Clinic, there also was a boarding home for mentally challenged adults. These people also needed care and help. There were not enough sisters. Therefore, head sister Helena came to me after All-Night Vigil on Theophany. She invited me to go to the boarding home on obedience. I was startled because I have a husband, two children and I worked at a factory at that time. I could not fathom how it would be possible for me to take part in this work. However, I felt this was God’s will, stopped hesitating, and agreed. When it was time to go to the clinic, I forced myself to go there because I could not imagine what would come as a result of that.

First, we made a round in the departments of the clinic. Our hearts were torn apart but we tried not to show it, although everything was clear enough. Now I believe that we had better had compassion on ourselves, not on the patients because mostly their souls are cleaner and closer to God than ours.

Our coming to the departments of the clinic was surprising for the patients. When I first came to the clinic, I imitated Father Andrew: first, we prayed with the patients, and then we started talking. God sent me two patients who had participated in church life for some time. They asked many questions regarding the Holy Scripture. We had an interesting discussion. I was pleased to be there. However, when I was returning home, I was extremely anxious. Later, I fell ill…

However, my infirmity did not damp my ardour; I went there for the second, and for the third time. I keep visiting the ill up to now. That was how I was on obedience for the first time.

After the first round in the clinic, the sisters decided to choose who would be responsible for each of the departments. I decided not to take part in the distribution of responsibility, so that there would be God’s will for everything. Since then, I have been visiting a high-security male department. There are many former criminals among the patients of this department. They had drunk a lot in the past, and that is why they became disabled. The patients of this department are hot-tempered, they use gross language and hit one another. Ward assistants shout to stop them at such moments. Later I understood that this was inevitable because otherwise order and discipline would not be maintained in the departments.

I decided at once that I would never read case reports of the brothers. I believe it is not necessary for me to know who has this or that illness because I want to see people as they are, as the Lord has sent them to me. Let there be nothing among us except God. Even if a brother does not seek for prayers and Communion, he is still precious for the Lord. Anyway, whatever spiritual needs the brothers have, we maintain simple friendly relationship. I usually ask them about their lives, they sometimes ask me to call their relatives or bring them an envelope, paper, or payphone card.

When I visit the brothers, I read to them, I tell them about the life of our Convent. I always tell them that the boarding home and the Convent are united. We pray for the successful construction of the Convent and an opportunity to see each other. I try to tell them about all events that happen in the Convent, such as feasts or visits of guests. If it is possible, we read books. Simple life stories never fail to touch their hearts. I try to express theological notions in a clear and simple language.

Time passes, these people start asking questions, and I am surprised. At first, I considered these people primitive but this is far from the truth. They understand everything very well, and their questions are a real consolation for me. At the end of my visit, I give them pieces of prosphora and holy water and anoint them with holy oil. We always read a prayer written by Schema-Archimandrite Sophronios that pleads with the Lord to unite us in Christ. I transform this prayer a little and say, “Lord, protect this department and protect it with the cover of Thine Mother and all Thine saints, blessing and preserving each of the ill and the suffering brothers who live there.”

There was an aggressive patient there. His name was Vladimir. One of the symptoms of his illness was that he used gross language very often. He became more peaceful in the last two or three years, and he even expressed his will to be baptized. Vladimir was baptized. Now he takes Communion and does not use bad words anymore. He always comes to me to be anointed with holy oil.

When did you become the head sister of the Sisterhood and what did you feel when you were offered the new obedience?

Six years ago, I came to the church for confession. Father Andrew called me and offered me to work in the Convent. I left my position at the factory because I felt this was in accord with God’s will. Later I came to a meeting of the Sisterhood, and Father said, ‘I have a question for you. Our head sister goes on a maternity leave. Can you take her place?’ I accepted this proposal without long hesitation.

I had to learn to drive a car and to organize people. When I worked at the factory, I had been responsible for my own work only. Therefore, everything was new to me. Now I have to contact the city authorities and directors of various enterprises. I have not yet learned everything so I try to do everything only with the blessing of Father Andrew.

What are the main tasks that you have to cope with as the head sister?

Father Andrew has never emphasized what tasks the head sister must accomplish. My obedience is to settle organizational issues with the sisters of mercy and to work with documents.

How many sisters are there in the Sisterhood now? What are their obediences?

Today there are about three hundred sisters in the Sisterhood. They have their obediences in the National Psychiatric Clinic, boarding homes for adults and children, city hospital No 2, Research Institute for Tuberculosis and in the numerous booths on the city streets where they help people with advice and prayer and offer the products of our Convent.

I try to follow Father Andrew’s example in my work with the sisters. I see that Father sacrifices all his heart to us during the meetings of both the monastic sisters and sisters of mercy held on Sundays. At first, it might seem that it does not matter whether you attend the meetings or not. This is wrong, however. The meetings are precious; they are like the heart of the Sisterhood. If a sister did not attend a meeting, if she did not receive spiritual power and did not receive Father’s blessing, I think she will be unable to carry out her ministry fruitfully.

How should a sister of mercy live?

Father Andrew said in the very beginning that one could be so zealous that she would ignore her duties related to her household, her husband, and her children. Obedience should not do harm to one’s family. How do we understand that? This means that I have to mobilize myself. For example, if I go to the boarding home and I know I will be there until late at night, I try to put everything in order at home, and cook the dinner. It is also important for me to have the blessing of my husband. He does not go to church, and sometimes I do not feel up to asking him, ‘Do you bless my going on duty?’ I tell him that I leave and look into his eyes. If he does not mind it, I go in peace. However, if I somehow manage to ask him whether he blesses me or not, and he answers that he does, then, even though it is said jokingly, this is an even stronger support for me, and I can easily go knowing that everything will be fine.

We cannot understand everything; we are theologians in a theoretical sense. As for the practical side of the issue, we do not have enough strength even for attentive listening to the service, and to keep silent when we are reproached. We ought to ask for a blessing for everything we do. We should not simply ask the spiritual father, “You bless me to do this, don’t you?”, but rather, “What will you bless me to do?” This will be the right way for a sister of mercy.

What is the meaning of the ministry of a sister of mercy?

The main sense is serving our neighbour. We can see our infirmity, our incapacity, but if we decide to do that because of our faithfulness to the Church, God will grant us strength and will act inside our souls.

What help do the sisters provide to the patients?

The most important help that the sisters provide to the patients is attention and care, and interest in their lives. Hospital is a place of great sorrow. It is sorrowful when one sees smart, educated and well-bred people who do not have peace in their hearts, some of whom hear voices and can not resist to them, and they are worried and aggressive because they can not help themselves. We come and do something they ask us for, talk with them, pray for them and comfort their worried souls.

What are the difficulties that a sister of mercy has to face?

God has arranged it so that we have not had external difficulties since the beginning. The main difficulty lies within our hearts. One has to learn to obey and renounce his will. In that case, the Lord will settle everything and give strength. When I worked at Minsk tractor plant, my shift began at 7 AM and was over by 4.30 PM. It was so noisy and hard to work there, and I felt absolutely exhausted by the end of the day. Nevertheless, I still had to go on church duty after that. When I finally got home at 9 PM, I suddenly realized that I felt good.

How do unbelievers react when they see a sister of mercy in a hospital ward?

Well-bred people react in a proper way. Some do not react at all; they simply sit around and do not interfere. Praise the Lord for that!

Do conflicts sometimes happen between sisters? How are they resolved?

There can be interpersonal conflicts. If there is a conflict, there is not humility and patience in one’s soul. A polite and well-bred person will never allow a conflict to happen. He will keep silent, tolerate everything, and skip the topic, for instance. It is because we do not know how to do it that conflicts happen. Who knows for sure what humility and patience are? That is why conflicts happen very often. How are they resolved? Praise the Lord, the sisters understand that they have to recourse to the power of the Sacraments of the Church to defeat their sins.

Do sisters leave the Sisterhood and why?

No, they do not leave the Sisterhood. On the contrary, they hold their obedience precious.

What unites the sisters?

Faith and unity in spirit. Moreover, I believe that all priests who serve in our Convent are of similar spiritual disposition. Surely, each of them is a personality, but the spirit of love, mercy, tolerance, and care unites all of them. This is the basis for the love, which unites all sisters.

What would you like to wish the sisters on the eve of our Convent’s tenth anniversary?

First, I would like to wish the sisters to become stronger and never abandon God.